Next try - end of January 2007

Dear Framily (friends & family)

I guess this must be the second or third time I have sat down to share our latest adventures through life with you. Seeing as we will soon be back in Fremantle/Perth for Mum’s 70th, we thought “Right.. This is it… if we don’t do it now, it’ ll never happen.”

So where to begin… it’s been 8 months now. We arrived into our new European > UK > East Sussex > Brighton/London > Friar Crescent/Patcham life on 16 May 2006. I remember doing the zoom in thing with Google Earth before we moved, and somehow this made it all feel a little more tangible back then.

You probably heard about the first week or two in the bedsit, then are very good fortune to find the house we are now in.. 33 Friar Crescent. In terms of neighbourhoods, we could not be happier. As life zooms us in to the minutia of everyday living, we get to know the streets and people immediately around home and school better than anywhere else.

Zooming right in, I guess what I see when I open my eyes each new day is where it all begins.. There is a lovely big window looking out from the second floor to a sky, ever changing.

This morning Bea was transfixed by the reflection of the “rainbow” sky in the mirror.. Pinks, greens, grey blues and yellows all diffused through an ‘altostratus duplicatus’ cloud form, I’m guessing… (Pretor-Pinney, G (2006) The Cloudspotter’s Guide - a gift from Gra to a cloud geek from way-back) :-)

Yes, the English weather is ever changing and always a jolly good way to make conversation with the natives.

Last week, the same window revealed Narnia in our back garden. It snowed!! Unusual for the South Coast. Woke up at 5.30am with Gra. Wow. So beautiful and still. No one around. Bea woke at 7.30.. an even thicker carpet of snow… kept rubbing her eyes. “I cant believe it Mama. Am I dreaming.” then ran straight to the wardrobe to see if she could get through the back. “It’s 0 degree’s isn’t it Mama.” Then we went tobogganing on the playing fields behind the house (thanks to eternally-kind neighbours giving us the gear and the good oil on slopes). No school that day…

When I expressed our delight to the school Mum’s, very sweetly, many said their child had been talking about how special the snow would be for Bea as a newcomer to the wonderful world of white. More on the Dharma School later, but suffice to say it is a very intimate community of 75 or so children and their families

I could go on for ever. Suffice to say I am one step closer to realising by true pagan nature. When I got to university late, my excuse was “As a pagan, I have to say that being here is like working on Christmas Day. It’s just not on!”

But how could I not! A leading professor of philosophy, a post-doctoral research fellow (both from the Guerrand-Hermes Foundation for Peace) there to provoke and inspire just three of us on ways of thinking, as people, and as educational researchers. So a segue now into what’s keeping me out of mischief. I have begun a Master of Arts in Person-Centred Education at the very special Sussex University. Two years part-time, with a grant for a good chunk of the fees and a huge amount of extra support and guidance from the GH Foundation for it to be offered in a person-centred way.

The first stage is to reflect, research and write a personal learning biography, with the intention being to draw out the personal questions that will motivate the research work and dissertation to follow.

Loads of ideas and much being written on my blog at www.barkingowl.com/learning for those interested in such things. It would be great to have some of you leaving comments and helping me reflect as things move along. A key element of person-centred learning is the centrality of community. And I guess you are that for me in a big way.

Mum was here when I had to decide whether to apply for a position or not. It turned out that one of the key philosophers inspiring this work back in the 1920s was a beautiful Scotsman and Quaker called John MacMurray. When I found out my grandmother Pam and then Jen been reading him in the 70s, the strong connection I was feeling with the course made even more sense. Then there are many connections with the Summerhill school, which our Lance Holt School was largely inspired by.

Have even managed to earn some decent income by selling freo.com, with some business ventures and educational projects in the pipeline too…

Now getting to the really yummy stuff. Our Bea… well. She turned 6 on the weekend and celebrated in style with a Disco Party at the school. She has come such a long way from the spirited and, let’s face it, rather challenging young child that she was. Her sense of wonder and delight at the world is a marvel to share. She is still a very affectionate and loving child and, well, she’s going really well. I guess with only one (so far) she gets her fair share of attention, and thanks to the divine Lisa Scelsi (au pair), there has been enough time and energy and love to go around even with Gra’s busy workload.

Weekends we will often go into the countryside, which is very close and very beautiful. There are a series of photos from life over here up at flickr. Go to …. and hopefully this will give you a good sense of what it’s like over here.

I guess what they won’t show, is all the boring, stressful stuff involved in moving country. All the paperwork, cost, fear, fights and foulness. Fortunately, that’s the exception not the norm and is a hump we are largely over now.

This is no doubt an expensive place to live, and school fee’s doesn’t help. But we have been really lucky with the house - 4 bedroom, two storey Art Deco with lots of original features. Lovely proportions and a bargain according to the locals. We feel surrounded by nature and it is very peaceful, yet with bustling, groovy Brighton just down the road, and that very unique school just a 5 minute drive away.

A couple of weekends ago, just before the snow, we were sitting by a fire in the garden cooking trout and sweet potatoes! The stars were bright and clear, nary a breeze in the air. Very relaxing. Within minutes we were scarpering in next door to Ken & Jane’s to dry out by their (far more sensible) in door fire.

I have never felt closer to nature than living here. Within the garden, within the countryside. After dropping Bea at school this morning, I nipped off to Ditchling Beacon to take in the Telly Tubby hills and ocean off in the distance. Just breathing it in. Rather necessary after the birthday party yesterday. Phew!

Gra Gra will relate the trials and tribulations of his adventures in the working world. From my perspective, I can see him working harder than he has ever done before, at least in the 10 years we have now been together. It really is a hard slog, into London with UBS for 5-mornings a week. And the money only just covers our bills with a little left over for saving and holidays. So, thank goodness for what is coming up on the horizon (we hope!) with scouta.com - which you are welcome to check out and subscribe to try out. (Just let us know and we will get you included in the secret Alpha testing). One way or another, we are looking forward to 2007 bringing less stress, more time and more money! It was a great idea for Gra to salary-sacrifice two weeks for the extra holidays, and he/we are going to need ever moment of them to recuperate and replenish.

Questions of life/work balance and what really matters for now - and for the future - don’t seem to have gone away yet. I guess they are some of the big ones throughout life, and especially when you have small children. But I do often wish we could have the economic times our parent’s lives through. I know they made do with less in some regards, but seem to have had a whole lot more in others. I look back over the abundance of our childhood.Ahh nostalgia. Seeing as I am going to be 40 next year, I guess I’m allowed a bit of it!

Of course travels beckon, even more so with so many options to choose from. I can’t believe we were even considering nipping to Goa for New Year with Pammy and Co. What a place. Gra and I got over to Jack and Penny’s fab house at www.negreval.com (an hour from Toulouse airport) for an anniversary weekend, which was rather lovely, sunbathing nude in the sun, just inside the frenchdoors in October.

There is no question that global warming is escalating. The daffodils are already up! This is unheard of. Hardly mass peril, but a sure sign in our little world that things are not quite right in the weather department. Someone needs to invent a word for: the feeling of enjoyment tinged with real dread you get, when walking around on a sunny day in November (Northern Hemisphere).

There will always be trips to the continent and further afield.. as this is a large reason of our wanting to be here, but the plan is to buy an old VW campervan soon and get around that way. We are starting to think about taking 3 months off sometime in the next few years for an extended camping trip around Europe. But first things first, and this summer we are looking forward to exploring parts of England a bit better, doing some music festivals (possibly performing at Glastonbury!), returning to be with our Buddhafields framily on retreat again, and perhaps getting over to France or Greece. Or whatever there is time for… roll on self-employment!

Two other dreams starting to emerge are.. sailing and home ownership. All the elements - water, air, earth and fire. The original idea of building a place is still with us, but not sure where or when. Might have to start out locally then see how things go… difficult questions, still unresolved. The sailing thing is a little more straight forward and starts simply with getting some seatime with the aim of Gra and perhaps me too getting the Day Sail Skipper qualification that allows you to charter a yacht. From there, the Mediterranean could be calling! We shall see… just want to feel that the Present is connecting with the Future and that dreams can turn into plans. Goal setting sees to be a very useful way to work and I know many people who have found great security and happiness from it.

Back to the Bea Bopper… hopefully you will see for yourself if you can make it to a BBQ in Baker’s Square Hamilton Hill on Saturday 17 January (no Val & Rob, we are not expecting you, I think we will have to come to you next won’t we! No there’s a novel way to spend New Year’s…).. but she has long hair now, comes up to … and is just as beautiful as ever (says her Mummy & Daddy). She is going really well at school and perhaps unsurprisingly, will often be found reading quietly in the book corner.. when she is not running around like a chook in the beautful big garden with all her mates. As a small community, they all play together and look after one-another which is really sweet to see. So yes, Bea is now reading fluently to herself and us. In terms of chapter books, she is LOVING Swallows and Amazons, which we are reading to her, plotting and scheming piratical adventures of our own on the low or high seas…

We have had so many visitors. Grandma and Nanny, then Howie, Kath & Ayesha over the summer, Londoners regularly, Buddhafields people from all around, Lorraine has just been to stay (very pregnant!) for a few days of clucking together, Peter Morris… wow. That’s quite a few isn’t it.

in gravyland

where we go to play